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Mindfulness is a skill anyone can acquire. It increases your awareness of what you are experiencing and provides enough space to decide how you want to respond in every situation. It’s an easy, always available way to calm yourself. Mindfulness involves directing your attention away from the negative, watching your thoughts without judgment and being more present in every moment. Practising mindfulness as a couple has proven mental health benefits. It can even help you argue less and thus have a happier, healthier relationship. Here are 4 ways you can be mindful together.


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1- Wait Your Turn and Speak Slowly

This involves really listening and analyzing what your partner is saying, without interruption or attempts to change uncomfortable feelings. When your partner has expressed themselves, pause and calm your mind and body, focusing only on the present moment. Then speak slowly to stay connected to your calm body.

2- Just Sit in Silence

The modern world is full of noise. We are plugged in 24/7. Make time to disconnect from your devices and be completely in the moment in your partner’s company. You don’t always need to fill the empty spaces with conversation. Just sit and enjoy the silence together. Comfortable silence is a good sign of deep intimacy.

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3- Appreciate Each Other Regularly

When you are both free, sit down and look into each other’s eyes. Tell your partner one thing they did that you appreciated. Share how that experience made you feel. Ask your partner to repeat what you said, so that you are both clear, then switch. Focusing on what your partner does for you will strengthen your bond. And everyone likes feeling appreciated.

4- Bring It Into the Bedroom

Being enthusiastic, curious and interested in your partners responses will make you a better lover. Don’t be afraid to experiment, listen to feedback and bring your sense of humor. In most daily situations it is best to think before you act, but when it comes to making love, it’s much better to go with the flow. It is all about being and staying present in the moment.

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As you become more mindful, your new found inner peace will be beneficial to both of you. Taking away unhealthy stress and gaining more power over your thoughts will help you become the kind of person your partner deserves.

Do you think your relationship needs some work? We can help. Call (510) 497-4174 today.


This post was written by Lani Gouws on behalf of The Bridge Therapy Center. If you have any questions or require more information, please contact Lani here:


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